About Kim
Kim was born at the Aberdeen Proving Ground, Maryland in May 1971, where her father was stationed with the US Army. Her parents, Jan and Sol, had known each other since childhood and married while finishing their college degrees at the University of Arkansas, Fayetteville. more...

After the school year ended, we all decided to rent a house together on La Loma Avenue in the Berkeley Hills– a great college-student pad with redwood walls, high ceilings and a large roof top deck for social events. It was a wonderful time where we went on road trips, had family dinners and house parties, and engaged in long conversations. It was within the first few months after moving into the La Loma house that our relationship deepened and we had realized that we wanted to be more than friends and officially became a "couple" in the fall of 1990.

We spent the next five years in the La Loma house. Shar graduated with a degree in Peace and Conflict Studies and began the challenging but rewarding task of developing a career in the mediation field. Kim later graduated with degrees in Political Science and Women Studies and began working as an administrator at a scientific research institute. It was there that her interest was sparked in computer technology and information systems.

By 1995, all of our friends had moved out out of the La Loma house and on. Some settled in other communities around the Bay Area, others spread out to other parts of the country and the world. We knew that it was time for us to get a place of our own. However, both of us had fallen in love with Berkeley and had begun growing roots here. Although neither of us was in any hurry to get married, we did envision our lives spent together. We also saw continued opportunities here for our long-term professional goals. So we rented a cozy apartment on Hilgard Avenue, just down the hill from the La Loma house.

After spending a few years in the working world, each of us decided to begin pursuing graduate level degrees. Shar started out in non-profit management and transferred over to studying law at Golden Gate University in San Francisco while continuing to work in community mediation. Kim returned to Cal Berkeley and entered the graduate program at the School of Information Management and Systems. Somehow, we also managed to find time be with each other, our friends and families, having many terrific experiences together, whether it was traveling, camping, playing games or simply enjoying a quiet evening at home.

By the end of 2001, both of us had completed our graduate programs. Shar was awarded a juris doctorate (J.D.) and Kim received her masters in Information Management. For better or worse, we both had missed out on the dot-com boom, being in school. Shar opted to remain at his job working for Berkeley Dispute Resolution Service, a community mediation and training program where he is thriving in a great environment working with wonderful people and projects. Kim managed to parlay what was originally a temporary assignment at Kaiser Permanente, a large non-profit HMO, into a permanent job helping develop and improve Kaiser’s intranet technology systems. It is a position that perfectly matches her skills and offers great opportunities for growth.

Having reached some significant goals that we set out for ourselves, the next logical step was to begin thinking more seriously about getting married. However one last hurdle had to be cleared – Shar had to pass the California State Bar Exam. After an intensive time of study, and then waiting for the results, we learned in May 2002 he was successful in that endeavor on his first try. With that out of the way, after twelve years of sharing our lives together, it was time to look forward to starting a new chapter of our life together.

Many things go into making a relationship a successful and lasting proposition. While life is full of uncertainties, we feel we have built a very strong foundation for marriage. Of course, the fact that we have been working at it for the last twelve years certainly has helped!

In turns out that we have much in common and many shared interests. First, as children, we both had traveled extensively with our families and have lived in different countries and experienced a variety of cultures.

Second, we both have strong Southern roots. Shar’s mom's family hails from West Kentucky and Kim’s extended family live in Northeast Arkansas. It is a great coincidence that they live within 2 hours of each other. It makes visiting family and making holidays plans a lot easier! Here are several other little coincidental facts... Both of our moms have been teachers and daycare directors. Both of us have grandmothers named Dorothy. We both have siblings who live or have spent extensive time in Las Vegas (more reasons to visit there!) and who have all done, or are also planning, destination weddings.

But our common interests do not stop there. We like to listen to the same kinds of music - while we have eclectic tastes, we love jazz and the great standards by Frank Sinatra, Billie Holiday, Rosemary Clooney, Etta James and others. We also have an appreciation of folk and bluegrass music thanks to our families. We have the same tastes in décor and architectural design (leaning toward Arts and Crafts style). We like to read many of the same kind of books, watch the same TV shows ("Scrubs" is our current fave) and enjoy going out to good restaurants (we love sushi, Thai, and Italian). We are also regular patrons of the theater.

While neither of us is avidly involved in any particular sport or outdoor activity, nor particularly stunning athletes, we enjoy dabbling in a variety of recreational activities doled out in moderate portions including hiking, bicycling, kayaking, skiing, backpacking, whitewater rafting, playing bocce and most recently, golf.

There was one thing that could have been problematic for us. Shar has a passion for playing all types of board and card games. Kim, however, was never all that enthusiastic of a game player. For those who know Shar – this could have been a deal-breaker for any long-term relationship! Fortunately, over the years, Kim has come around, especially in learning to play the card game of bridge. Of the two of us, she now plays bridge far more often because she has hooked up with other enthusiasts at work and plays at lunch. Otherwise, we make the effort to play cards whenever we can with our close friends Misa and Lars and others. Of course, in the interest in preserving a harmonious relationship – we are almost never partners!